How Much Is Enough?

How Much Is Enough?

“Try your best to enter by the narrow door, because, I tell you, many will try to enter and will not succeed.” (Luke 13:24)   

         Luke makes no effort to soften these Words of Jesus.  Matthew’s version of the narrow gate (Mt 7:13) is no different.  They are not meant to provide comfort, but to light a Fire.  Other translations of Luke say ‘Make every effort’ or ‘Strive’ to enter.  In each case, the root meaning evokes struggle –a struggle in which many will not succeed.  

         What Jesus says, and who Jesus is, is one and the same.  He said, “I am the Way, the Truth and the Life.”  He said what he lived.  If I am to be obedient to what he Says, then my life must be congruent with his Life.  And if this is the standard, against which I will fail or succeed, then what cause do I have to Hope?  Do I have even kindle for Fire?  

         The things I Profess with all my heart are the very things which expose the gap between ‘what I say’ and ‘who I am’.  It is the gap in my Integrity -where what I Profess is not fully integrated into what I Do. This gap is the portrait of my Weakness, my Self-Delusion, my Unwillingness to Die, my Hidden Distrust of God’s Love.  It is a reflection of my compromised commitment to the Narrow Way.

          ‘Try your best to enter by the narrow door…’ these Words of Jesus are exhorting me to narrow my gap, for, ‘to live a holy life is to be holy just as he is holy.’ (1Jn 3:7).  But will my ‘best’ be good enough?  If I, in this life, will never live up to what I Profess -to be a faithful follower of Christ- then, what cause do I have to Hope?  Do I have even kindle for Fire?

         I have a vivid memory four decades old.  Shame has not allowed it to fade.  I just gave my life to Christ and had a brand new Cross hanging from my neck.  I stopped by a friend, with whom I had done drugs in the past, to witness to him.  I began that night telling him about my new life in Jesus and I left that night stoned.

This memory, though shameful, is a sure cause to Hope.  I was unfaithful but Jesus remained faithful.  I abandoned him, but he did not abandon me.  As I was struggling in my failure, he was rejoicing in my return.

‘…many will try to enter and will not succeed.’  Yes, this is a hard Word.  Yes, Jesus, the Inviolable Truth, defines what is acceptable to the Kingdom of God; and he is the Only Door; but… he is the Narrow Way which opens wide to the Prodigal’s Father -whose Mercy searches the horizon of sin for a Repentant Soul.

         This event of trying to enter by the narrow door is not the moment at the end of my life when I am judged (then, it would be too late); it is every moment of my life since saying “yes” to Jesus’ invitation.  It is the lifelong struggle of submitting to the Saving Hand of God.  And from this perspective, not only will many not succeed, but all will fail!  For, we all have fallen short in sin.  

         The Many, who will not succeed, are not those who fail, but those who quit; who leave the path; who say, “Yes Father, I will do your work” but then, go their own way.  They are the ones who relinquish the Struggle, who resign themselves to the Lukewarm.

         John’s perspective of ‘Jesus-The-Gate’ is from a different window than Matthew and Luke:  Jesus says, ‘I am the gate.  Anyone who enters through me will be safe: he will go freely in and out and be sure of finding pasture.’ (Jn 10:9).  Jesus is still the Way and the Truth, but here, rather than focusing on Truth’s Judgment, John emphasizes Truth’s Salvation: If we, the Needy Sheep, walk in the Freedom of Truth we will surely find Life.

         Truth; Judgment; Salvation; Repentance; Obedience and Mercy –These are the footstones of the Narrow Way to Life and many will not find their footprints upon them.  This is the truth that brings God to tears.  …But for the Grace of God.  …But for the Grace of God.

         Jesus has brought me a long way since my shameful first attempt to evangelize.  I have failed many more times at the Narrow Way.  And each time my Good Shepherd rescues me -at the price of his Blood- always carrying me, held to his breast, back to the Fold.  My struggle is as hard as it has ever been, but the gap between what I Profess and who I Am has narrowed –and this is great cause for Hope; kindling for his Fire.

Will He Find Any Faith?

Will He Find Any Faith?

“But when the Son of Man comes, will he find any faith on earth?” (Luke 18:1-8)    

Luke prefaces the parable of the Importunate Widow with the call to pray continuously without losing heart, then, tells how the widow, after unrelentingly pestering the unscrupulous judge, receives a just settlement.  Lastly, he unleashes this fateful question of Jesus.  

This Gospel snapshot, on first read, seems disjointed.  It begins as if it’s a primer on prayer, yet, the widow is not portrayed as prayerful or pious, but as demanding justice against her enemy; the judge has no similarities to God; and it concludes with Jesus’ startling question about his Second Coming.

The beauty, of a portrait painted in broad strokes, is hidden close up.  One must back away from it to capture its fullness.  So too, the Truth of these eight verses lies hidden until we back away from its literal setting.  Like a good painting, this parable makes its statement through contrast.  If a feisty widow, with nagging, can secure just settlement from a secular judge who hands out justice based on personal profit, how much more can a person of faith, with unrelenting prayer, find Recompense from a merciful God?  

On the surface, Jesus is telling us if we persevere in prayer, especially when it seems like God is not listening, we will surely be rewarded.  But, that he seals this parable with the Daunting Question, ‘will he find any faith on earth?’, speaks of something deeper than the shallow motivation of getting what we want if we persist in asking –he is summoning us to a life of Faith; to live as if God’s Promise is true, and to do so, not only in the absence of evidence, but even when evidence is to the contrary.

This kind of intractable Faith, is what gave Abraham the strength to offer his only begotten son.  It goes against our feelings, desires, and logic.  It offers no proof, but demands unconditional commitment.  As such, it is as uncommon as the ‘hard road that leads to life, and only a few find it’ (Mt 7:14).  Jesus forewarns us, that when he comes again, he will be looking for Faith, and he wonders aloud, if he will find any.  

He frames this intractable Faith as rare among men because it is not of man.  It cannot be conjured up like a fanciful wish, nor called forth as a feat of strength.  It cannot be earned.  It is won only by surrendering -to an Unseen Power, and at that, it is usually discovered after exhausting all other options.  If it is ever secured, it is only after having lost it many times.  It is never neat and tidy, but tattered and bloody.  Once known it cannot be unknown, yet it is easily forgotten in times of comfort.  

 Faith is an ephemeral mystery because it is a Gift not of our world –it is the Stuff of God.  We must believe it before we can know it -as courage cannot exist outside of fear, Faith cannot exist outside of uncertainty.  It exists in the absence of what we desire; in our desperation for consolation; in the strength of our weakness; in the impossible hoped possible.  

We can no more grasp Faith with our mind than we can hold onto Jello with our fingers, yet Faith is our only link to God –our only lifeline to transcend suffering and death.  As such, Faith is the Supreme Gift.  It is given for all to freely receive, yet the Many have rejected it.  Now, all gifts are given on the terms of the Giver, so isn’t it curious then, that Man would spurn the God-Given because it is not on his terms?  Oh, the Curse of Pride!  It is Pride then, which gives Christ the pause to wonder if he will find any Faith on earth.

          Lord, the Importunate Widow’s tragedy was her blessing –her poverty robbed her of the luxury of Pride -she was free to beg for mercy.  Oh Holy Spirit of my Lord Jesus, rob me of my Pride.  May my poverty of spirit free me to relentlessly beg your Mercy.  Good Father, I shall ever praise you for sending your Son to make straight the Way.

Today

Today

By your Grace, Lord,

Long Ago has become my Friend

…singing softly of your Power to Save.

And by your same Faithful Grace,

the Darkness of what is Yet To Be,

is a Provocation to Hope

…Reaching back into Now.

For the Past, now conquered

and testifying to your Truth,

is forever consigned

to point to a Future

filled with your Unchanging Mercy.

What was, and what is to be,

is cause to Praise,

to fall deeper in Love.

Lord, I can only love you this Moment Now,

in this your Gift of Today.

Here, you are my Refuge,

my Abode of Truth,

where your Mighty Right Hand sustains me,

where you are the Rock shoring up my feet;

where you cloak me in the Comfort of your Word.

Today, this Sacred Moment Now,

is enough to Be in You.

Happy Tails

Happy Tails

Recently, neurologists discovered that smiling is not merely a result of a happy feeling.  They found that the act of smiling, even when forced, activates an area in our brain which produces a sense of well being; and, that same mood enhancing effect is produced in another’s brain when they view our smile.  Reading this discovery triggered a memory of a silly fantasy I had entertained.

Let me digress.  Our kitchen has a set of French doors to an open back porch.  Every morning as I grope my way to the coffee pot, I am met by our dog, Staush, who lies waiting outside those doors.  As he hears my approaching footsteps, even before he lifts his head, his tail begins to wag.  It never ceases to give me joy.  He remains there as I have my prayer time at the nearby table.  

It was there I happened upon the fantasy (my mind often wanders during prayer.)  It began as I was thanking God for how Lovingly Made is his gift of dog to man –how dogs bring such joy.  If my chair stirs, or I turn my head toward the door, Staush’s tail will start to wag.  It has very long, dense fluffy hair, so it is like a flag waving, saying, “I am happy that you are here with me!”  The joy that his wagging tail evoked within me, caused me to fantasize how wonderful it would be if humans had tails which evoked joy into each other.

God created man out of Love and for Love, so when we are loved, we experience the affirmation of our deepest need, and this, we experienced as Joy.  God is Triune Love -where the identity of the Three Persons dissolve into One, each belonging to the Other.  God created man in His Image.  Such then, explains our need to belong.

So maybe, in creating Man’s Best Friend, God created dog in man’s image.  In giving the dog a driving need to belong to a pack, the dog, like Man, can only be joyful in belonging to another.  

 Now I realize, my secret disappointment in God’s tailless design for us, is for naught.  He did not give us tails because he gave us something much better.  He gave us a Smile.  

A smile is better, not just because a tail would make it harder to wear cloths; it is way better because we can wear a smile when we are happy and when we are not.  Staush doesn’t know his tail is wagging, he just knows he is delighted in my presence, and his tail shouts it so.  A smile can sneak onto our face when we are happy.  But we can also make a smile to make another person happy.

The gift of our smile is as powerful as it is delightful.  With the slightest effort of a smile, we can interject Joy into the life of another –actually bypassing their choice in the matter.  And to possess such a profound power calls us to a profound responsibility.  Does not the Heavens demand, that in possessing such a Precious Gift, which has no cost, that we must give it away –especially to those most in need?

          Two centuries past, Abe Lincoln said, “Smile and you will be happy.”  He understood what neural researchers, only today, have discovered.  Two millennia past, Jesus said, “Smile and make people happy.” (Well, ok, he’s not actually recorded as saying that –I just deduced those words from his Word that was recorded.)  How different we would be, and the world around us, if with every person we meet, we would smile with our ‘Happy Tail’ –we would say, “I am happy that you are here with me!”

Do Not Be Afraid!

Do Not Be Afraid!

My Beloved Child,

You Belong to Me.

The God, who cherishes You,

Holds All Things in existence.

How then, can you be Afraid?

A Leaf cannot Fall,

Nor a Bolt of Lightning let fly

-unless I Permit it.

All who Call upon my Name I Save.

How then, can you be Afraid?

I Am the Lord, your God.

I Know how Tomorrow unfolds.  

I Know the plan of Hope I have for you.  

My promises Belong to You.  

How then, can you be Afraid?

   

My Beloved Child,

You Bear my Name,

Carry my Father’s Love,

and Possess my Holy Spirit.  

Go Forth then,

-in Faith and Joy.

Share what you Know to be True.  

Tell my People,

                                         “Do Not be Afraid!”

He Saw A Man

He Saw A Man (Matthew 9:9)

“As Jesus was walking on from there he saw a man named Matthew sitting by the customs house, and he said to him, 'Follow me'.  And he got up and followed him.”  

         ‘As Jesus was walking on from there…’  Flashback: He had just come from the house where a paralytic was lowered through the roof.  The Pharisees condemned Jesus for forgiving the paralytic’s sins, whereupon Jesus proved the Son of Man has the authority to forgive sins by miraculously healing him.

         ‘…he saw a man named Matthew’.  Jesus beheld a tax collector, a Sinner loathed by all, but saw a Man -whom he had called into existence, whom his Father loves, who is alive by the Breath of his Spirit.  Moved by compassion, Jesus called Matthew into his Fold of Friends.  Matthew was Forgiven before he was Friend.

         Later, while celebrating a meal with his New Friend, Jesus was disparaged for associating with sinners.  He replied, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick.  Go learn the meaning or of the words ‘What I want is mercy, not sacrifice.’ And indeed I did not come to call the virtuous, but sinners.”  (Matthew 9:12-13)

         If it were I in the body and place of Jesus, I would have seen, not Matthew the Man, but a Sinner.  I would have seen the Tax Collector, the Extorter of Widows -who leeched upon the poor, who ate the bread of hungry children; who forced fathers to labor late hours to feed his greed.  I, who had shared the sins of Matthew, who had been Forgiven and called into The Fold, would have yet still seen the Sin.  At best, in my busyness of doing good, I would have judged him ‘not ready’ for The Fold.  

         But the Truth is, I am in the Body and Place of Jesus.  I have answered his call.  I am sent to Forgive the sin; to Embrace the sinner -to Befriend all into The Fold.  It is for me to say, “My brother, I have sinned and been forgiven -and you can be too!  I was sick and have been healed -and you can be too!”  It is for me to say, “Hey Matt, take my hand -let us follow Jesus.  He’s calling us into The Fold!”

        Jesus, I want to love with your Heart, to see with your Eyes.  Wrench from my soul all disparaging thoughts, pride and condescension.  Shield my eyes from the Problems that I may see the Possibilities.  Let not my inclination to judge blind me of Love and Hope.  

         Lord, whoever is touched by your Spirit is made New.  When you bring before me one sickened by sin, as I behold the sickness, let me see the Life to be.  May your Mercy give me eyes to see The Man you are calling into Being.

The Cross

The Cross

                 The Cross is a Darkened Doorway beckoning Sinners.  It is the Mysterious Interface between Fallen Humanity and the Glory of God - the blood stained rocky road of the Christian Way.  The Cross has two faces.  The face we can see is Black, Dark, Of Death –reflecting our Sin.  The face we cannot see, the side facing Glory, is Resplendent –reflecting God’s Light.  

The Cross is about Sin and Redemption; Death and Life.  It is a Pilgramage from Sin and Death into Redemption and Life.  All must take up their Cross.  We must enter into Suffering before we emerge into Glory.

It is the Promise of Glory hidden.  When we take up the Cross, there is no sense of Victory, only Defeat.  To bear the Cross is to Suffer.  There is no comfortable position.  The Cross only shows us our Sin, our Brokenness, our Smallness.  Even Jesus cried out, ‘My God, my God, why have you abandoned me?’ as the Cross swallowed him into Death. (Matthew 27:45)

No one submits to the Cross, unless bitten by Death, unless Desperate for Life.  Even then, they must first Believe –that Self, has no power over Death, no source for Good, no claim to Eternal Life.  And if then, so humbled, the Soul must yet Believe that Glory and Life can only be found in that Darkened Cross –as when the Israelites looked up upon the Bronze Serpent Moses prescribed.   They could turn, to that which was Lowly and Raised High, or die. (Numbers 21:4-9)

If the Cross is cause for Hope, it is even more so a Quandary of Faith -for, the Tree of Life is Dark Mystery.  The Cross is Mystery because its Work is contrary to its Fruit: Dying yields Life; Suffering yields Joy; Surrender yields Victory; and Obedience yields Freedom.  The Cross is Dark -we neither taste, nor see, nor feel the Saving Fruit of its Work –we must Blindly Believe we are being Saved...

...As when the Hammer Of God beats the Sword into a Plowshare (Isaiah 2:4): every blow of the Hammer disorients the Sword; each painful blow robs the Sword of its Status and Might; each transforming blow diminishes, with Unrelenting Mercy, everything the Sword once held with Pride.  The Sword is blind to its Transformation.  And even if, the Hammer Bearer should relent a peek of the Plowshare-To-Be, the vision would be reviled.

What, but desperation, would allow the Sword to submit to the hammer?  What, but Mercy, could arrange such fate?  Dare the Sword expect to understand the Cross?  No language of words can possibly explain -and to experience the Cross only blurs its meaning.  Are we then, condemned to suffer its Inexplicable Blows without the comfort of Meaning?  Was the Son of God spared Darkness in the Sixth Hour?

What mortal possesses such Virtue?  What Sinner can summon this Cross?  Who standing, can submit to its Stripes?  “…they were astonished. 'Who then, can be saved?' they asked.  Jesus gazed at them. 'For men, he told them 'this is impossible; for God, everything is possible.'” (Matthew 19:25)

In Truth, we do not choose the Cross –in Mercy, it finds us.  In Truth, we do not carry its weight –in Mercy, Jesus still bears its Burden.  “Yes, God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him may not be lost but may have eternal life.  For God sent his Son into the world not to condemn the world, but so that through him the world might be saved.” (John 3:16-17)

We do not save ourselves –it is the Dark Mysterious Cross, reaching through time and space, with the Eternal Loving Blood of Jesus, carrying us -as Shepherd with Lamb against breast.  No matter how Weak, or Naked, or Alone we feel in the Darkness of the Cross, the Love of Jesus secures us, as surely as  Nails to the Wood, until He brings us into Glory.

           In the end, the Cross is the Divine instrument of Mercy: bringing Meaning to our Suffering; Forgiveness for our Sins; and Healing into our lives.  It is the Portal of God’s Love, through which he snatches us …in our Desperate need to be Saved.                                                                                                                                                                                                        

Desire For God –Psalm 63

Desire For God –Psalm 63

 

“God, you are my God, I am seeking you, my soul is thirsting for you, my flesh is longing for you, a land parched, weary and waterless; I long to gaze on you in the Sanctuary …” (Ps 63:1)

 

          Lord, your Word is a Love Song –a Revelation of what Love awaits the Soul seeking its Creator.  We are created for You.  Our entire Being, body and soul, Longs for You, as parched earth for water.  Yet, our nature cannot hold this Truth, having only vague Feelings of Incompleteness, as we gaze upon your stars.

 

“…and to see your power and glory …Your love is better than life itself, my lips will recite your praise; all my life I will bless you, in your name lift up my hands; my soul will feast most richly, on my lips a song of joy and, in my mouth, praise.” (Ps 63:2-5)

 

When Grace kisses our Blindness, and we are Awakened from Death; when your Light emblazons our soul, our heart swoons at Love’s First Taste.  When your Spirit fills our soul, as wind a sail, Love’s Joy demands a Response -your Praises must be sung.  Our heart is flung toward You, our journey toward Union begins.

 

“On my bed I think of you, I meditate on you all night long for you have always helped me.  I sing for joy in the shadow of your wings; my soul clings close to you, your right hand supports me.” (Ps 63:6-8)

         Having dipped our Dry Morsel into the Wine of your Cup, we can only desire more.  Our Lowliness is displaced with Glory, our Tears transcend to Song.  Love’s Yearning longs to Cling –as a child to Mother, as beloved to Spouse, until two become One.  Only in You, oh Lord, is our soul at Rest.

I Know My Name

I Know My Name

He was a mangy looking dog.  Abandoned as a puppy, he grew up in the streets.  Master found him in the shelter the day before he was to be put down, for he was an unsightly dog that no one would adopt.  Master brought him home, and gave him a bath that made him all shiny and clean.  That is when then he got his name -Toby.

Just as his coat was getting fluffy and dry, Master went to check the barn.  As soon as Toby saw the door open, he bolted out in a flash.  Master called out his name, “Toby!  Come back to Me!”  But Toby did not know his name -he did not know Who he belonged to, and he did not know the plans of His Master. Toby just ran as fast as he could.

Master found him again in the shelter, all matted with filth, but He loved him all the more.  Toby spent time with Master.  He ate with Him, slept at the foot of His bed, and followed Him like a shadow.  He came to love the smell of Master, and his tail now waged at the sound of His Voice.

In knowing the love of Master, Toby grew devoted to Him.  He now understood that he belonged to Master.  When he heard Master’s truck, He ran to meet Him.  When Master called his name, he went bounding to Him.  He sought the touch of Master’s tender hands.  When Master said, “Fetch the sheep!” he delighted in chasing them into Master’s barn.  And when Master said, “Watch the sheep!”, he proudly protected them -he would even die for them.

If Master said, “Come!”, and pointed to the truck, he would be overcome with joy to ride with Master, so much so, that he would act like a puppy.  And when Master said, “Stay!”, Toby’s wag would slow a little, but he would dutifully guard the Master’s house.

At day’s end, Toby would lay at Master’s feet.  It was there, in that time without words, with eyes lightly shut, that he felt especially close.  But if he sensed the slightest stir, the eye closest to Master would peek open, and his tail would begin to wag with expectant joy.

    Toby had become faithful to Master.  Everything he did, he did for Master.  Toby had come a long way since that wonderful, fearful day Master saved him.  It only took a week or so, to learn the name by which he was called.  But now, as the years have gone by, Toby, in his heart of hearts, has come to know the Name which makes him belong to Master!

Until we know our name, until we know who we really are, and who we belong to, we will not recognize the Voice who is calling.  “When that day comes - it is Yahweh who speaks - …I will betroth you to myself for ever, betroth you with integrity and justice, with tenderness and love; I will betroth you to myself with faithfulness, and you will come to know Yahweh.  …I will love Unloved; I will say to No-People-of-Mine, 'You are my people', and he will answer, 'You are my God'.” (Hosea 2:18)

         And as years go by 0f having been loved by Jesus, we can look back and remember that wonderful fearful day when he saved us -when our ears were opened, when we could recognize His Voice, when we could hear his Spirit whisper those Words we are all so desperate to hear, “You are My Beloved.  I created you Good.  You are Precious in My sight, and you belong to Me!”

The Door

The Door

         What’s up with The Door?  Two Gospels make reference to The Door which locks us out of God’s Presence.  Matthew 25:10 refers to the Foolish Bridesmaids caught unprepared by the Bridegroom’s arrival.  They begged to be let in, but the The Door to the banquet hall was already locked, and the Bridegroom said to them, “I do not know you.”  Luke 13:25 refers to the Master, who after a long day’s work, got up from supper, and locked The Door to go to bed.  To the stragglers who begged, ‘Lord, open to us’, the Master said, “I do not know where you come from.”  In both Gospels, those locked out are condemned as Strangers to God.

         Lest we portray Jesus as mercilessly cruel, there is a third reference to The Door –one with a profound nuance.  In Revelations 3:20, John also references The Door which separates the Unrepentant Sinner from Jesus, but this time, it is Jesus who is begging to be allowed to come in: “Behold, I am standing at the door, knocking. If one of you hears me calling and opens the door, I will come in to share his meal, side by side with him.”  

         In all three cases The Door separates us from Jesus.  In Matthew and Luke, The Door keeps us from Jesus, yet in Revelations, The Door keeps Jesus from us.  In Matthew and Luke, the Sinner does not control the lock.  Yet, in John, the Sinner controls the lock.  So, what is The Door and how does its lock work?

         Clearly, The Door is the consequence of personal sin, for sin separates us from God.  Sin renounces the Reign of God over our life as it exalts the Reign of Self over God.  Sin is the bottom line of where we stand in relationship to God.  We are cast as Strangers, not because Jesus does not know our name, or where we were born, but because our selfish life is foreign to him –he knows only the Will of the Father.  He cannot relate to disobedience, nor can the Disobedient relate to him.

         If The Door is the consequence of sin, then the lock speaks to the ‘eternal-ness’ of that consequence.  Matthew and Luke plainly describe, that once The Door is shut, it cannot be opened –yet, John clearly has Jesus hoping it will open again.  Why the difference?  The difference is not so much ‘why’ as ‘when’ -for the ‘when’ makes all the difference in the world.

         In Matthew and Luke, The Door is locked at the coming of Night.  Scripture tells us we have but one life to live, and then we are judged.  Like the Bridesmaids, ‘we do not know either the day or the hour’ of that All Important Moment -when our ultimate destiny becomes Eternally Chosen.

         And lest we portray this Sober Truth as mercilessly cruel, John, the Disciple Whom Jesus Loved, leaves us with the Hope of Mercy –with the Sacred Heart of Jesus knocking at The Door of our heart, begging that we trust him to become Lord in our life.  While we yet breathe, we are in the Season of Mercy –repenting of our selfish ways immediately opens The Door to the Bridegroom who so Desires our heart.