Lord, I Do Not Understand
The Gospel, in John 16:17-18, betrays the disciples' foreboding: “We do not know what he means.” they grumbled. The disciples were bewildered by Christ’s portrayal of things to come. His words lead them into Mystery. When they complain, his response leads them into still deeper Mystery. Jesus clearly was not compelled to quiet their questions.
It is not our right to demand that life makes sense. It seems even, that inner turmoil is what drives us toward transcendence. What Jesus gives us is sufficient: our Faith in him; and his Spirit in us. This is all that is required to finish both, today’s journey, and our life’s work.
The senseless unfolding of world events need not steal our Gift of Peace. “If only things were different, then I would be happy.” This is illusion. If I am discouraged or distraught, it is because I have misplaced my focus: I have given my eyes to what is out of my control; I have become distracted from the task of my Lord; I have become a Bleating Sheep –frightened by the shadows of wolves on the horizon, unable to hear the Consoling Song of my Good Shepherd.
The Darkness which surrounds me is stripped of its Fear –if, I but keep my eyes upon he who leads me –if, I but obediently place my foot upon today’s step stone, so lovingly lighted. All that is necessary, to remain in his Peace, is to be a faithful Steward of his Love, to give away the Love of Jesus, according to, and in the Power of, his Holy Spirit. This is our Purpose. In embracing it, his Peace embraces us.
His Word is alive… The Shepherd’s Voice is ever speaking: I am God and you are not. I am the Good Shepherd, and you are my Flock. Be still, and know that I am God. It is for me to be strong. Peace I bequeath to you, my own peace I give you, a peace the world cannot give, this is my gift to you. Do not let your hearts be troubled or afraid. Your Faith has saved you, go in Peace.
